Written by You&Milk - Updated on Jul 25, 2024
Photo credit: Ketty Line
So many of you have followed my pregnancy since the announcement we made in April 2020 (it feels both so far away and so close at the same time...) on social media, and just as many have asked me to share all my mum-to-be tips with you!
It is therefore with great pleasure that I share myself here today... and of course, this article is personal, and each mom has the freedom to pick from this article what seems relevant and useful to her.
THE ANNOUNCEMENT
For those who have known us for more than a year, that is, before the launch of our brand in September 2019, you know that Edouard and I are very attached to reserving little surprises for each other, whether in daily life or for big occasions.
Also, to announce my pregnancy to Edouard for Thelma, our first little girl, I had hidden my phone in the living room to film, I had prepared a breakfast on a Saturday morning by buying for Edouard the mug from Emoi Emoi "Papa poule", which I placed on the table with a small box next to it containing my positive pregnancy test, as well as a little baby hat that we had bought a year earlier during our trip to Peru, telling ourselves it would bring us luck for our future baby.
I’ll let you imagine his joy and emotion when he arrived to have his breakfast, it was an incredibly moving moment and I’m happy to have captured it on video!
For my second pregnancy with Andréa, I really wanted to involve Thelma in the announcement, and that’s why when I saw the positive test, I chose to keep the secret to myself and I won’t hide from you that the five days that followed were the loooooongest of my life, it was a Monday, I will remember it all my life…
Thelma and I went to the medical analysis lab together, and when I received the results by email in the mid-afternoon, a wave of emotion overwhelmed me, and I immediately shared it with Thelma who, to be honest, didn’t understand everything that was happening ;)).
Since Edouard and I both really love photography (and it was actually the theme of our wedding), and we had often done Lifestyle photo sessions together, then during my first pregnancy, and after Thelma's birth, I immediately contacted the photographer Alexandra Maldémé to explain that I wanted to organize a photo shoot the following Saturday at the Serres d’Auteuil in Boulogne, to announce the big and wonderful news to Edouard and have a (spontaneous) visual memory of this memorable day!
Photo credit: Alexandra Maldémé
Alexandra was super excited about the idea, and here we are five days later at the Serres d’Auteuil... I had to explain to Edouard why, just like that, I had scheduled a last-minute photo shoot... I was as excited as a flea... a very natural and spontaneous session as we like, and at one point during the session, Alexandra gave Thelma a small slate that I had discreetly hidden in a bag, and on it was written "daddy, I'm going to be a big sister."
It was both a moment filled with joy and emotion, as you can imagine! And once again, we could have a visual memory of this indescribable moment.
But for very, very impatient girls, I don't recommend this kind of announcement ;-), because clearly you will suffer too much during the looooong days you have to wait ;)). By the way, most of you told me you would never have lasted that long!
But I can assure you that this wait was worthy of the emotion of the moment...
The photographer who did the photoshoot announcing my pregnancy to Edouard:
Alexandra Maldémé
http://www.maldemephotographe.fr/
THE BEGINNINGS
To be original ;), I was quite sick during the first three months, and very tired like many future moms carrying life.
What helped me a lot in this first trimester was practicing sophrology and meditation.
My favorite apps for meditating:
- Headspace
- Petit bambou
- Mind meditation
- Insight timer
(all downloadable on iPhone and Android)
To help compensate for this great fatigue, I went to bed by 9:30 PM at the latest, took a course of vitamins and supplements (Gestarelle is great and very complete), and my gynecologist prescribed me iron and magnesium.
It was difficult to explain to Thelma my great fatigue, my difficulty finding the little energy required to read the bedtime story, our ritual all three of us... I blamed myself a lot, but by putting words to this fatigue, I felt she understood and forgave me.
I will make a small aside about the lockdown, which I emotionally struggled with as a future mom.
Indeed, I confided in Edouard and by phone to Flavia Nasio, Bloomdoula, about the guilt I felt towards this baby growing inside me, in a context of fear, constant anxiety, and confinement.
I managed to put into words how I felt: I had the feeling that this lockdown didn't allow my baby to exist. We had to stay at home, so in a way "hidden," and I felt like I was hiding this pregnancy that we were so happy and proud of!
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THE SEX OF OUR BABY
For this second pregnancy, Edouard and I chose to be surprised by the sex of our baby :)!
It was a beautiful adventure, and meeting our baby was going to be doubly intense and full of surprises: meeting this little being and discovering whether we would welcome a little boy or a little girl.
The sex of our baby was far from our concern, only their good health mattered and being able to hold this little being in our arms a few months later!
Clearly... impatience took over us in the last weeks, it's exciting not to know, but it's also a little "torture" ;).
And just goes to show that intuitions aren't always right, I was sure I was carrying a little boy for this second pregnancy, but it turned out we were going to meet our second little love, a little girl!
No preference, honestly, just a GREAT joy that Andréa is joining our lives and expanding our hearts and family!
ON THE PLATE SIDE
To calm and soothe my darn nausea during the first four months, I drank a lot of ginger and lemon herbal teas, which relieved me quite quickly.
I also discovered the exquisite 100% organic herbal infusions from Mama Rosae, adapted to the ailments and needs of expectant and new mothers: nausea, contractions, breastfeeding,...
I had the chance to try the "Cotton Night" range designed to calm pregnancy-related insomnia, and I will try "Welcome baby" at the very end of my pregnancy, which promotes a natural, quick, gentle delivery.
It's true that having also gained a lot of weight during this second pregnancy (20 kilos at 37 weeks, because I gave birth a month earlier than the expected term... our little Andréa was eager to meet us...), I tried to watch what filled my plate. What's crazy is that I didn't have major cravings, but I retained a lot of water. Really a lot.
And honestly, gaining weight during my pregnancy was never a source of worry for me as long as I didn't develop gestational diabetes. My body and my baby needed those reserves, so I didn't beat myself up. And the great gynecologist who had already supported us for Thelma never made me feel guilty about this. What a relief because I know many gynecologists pressure their patients, who like me, gain a lot of weight despite not eating just anything!
For snacking, I discovered the snacks "la fabrique des mamans", organic and healthy bars that meet the specific needs of young moms and moms-to-be.
Their Immunity range is perfect during pregnancy just like their Breastfeeding range afterwards, which helps boost lactation.
Regarding cravings, and just like when I was expecting Thelma, I wanted to eat pad thai absolutely every day at any hour of the day or night! And my adorable darling became an expert in preparing this dish that I never get tired of!
Her recipe here:
Recipe available in the book "9 mois food", given by a friend when I was expecting Thelma (full of delicious recipes!)
Not being immune to toxoplasmosis, we were very careful to wash all fruits and vegetables, vinegar-marinated raw vegetables, to cook meat thoroughly...
Interesting article that I invite you to read: https://www.laurencepernoud.com/grossesse/grossesse-alimentation/a-a-z-abecedaire-aliments-a-eviter-ou-a-privilegier.html
I never deprived myself during my two pregnancies, but I always tried to eat as healthily as possible and limited my indulgences to one big treat per week, because I hate frustration on the plate.
Other cravings: pickles, mustard by the spoonful (yes, I swear), almond chocolate croissants, Dragibus candies, "Caprice des Dieux" cheese (oops, the ad!), Perrier grenadine, cheesy pasta at 4 p.m. or at 10 p.m. ;),...
LOOKS SIDE
So I was never very fond of maternity dresses, simply because very often, they didn't match my style, the fashion I love.
For Thelma, Édouard and my mom each gave me maternity dresses that I enjoyed wearing, but for this second little baby, I must admit I bet everything on flowing dresses with an empire waist, which I accessorized with a small belt under the bust to nicely shape my belly, no maternity pants, no maternity jeans, because I didn't want to feel cramped in my clothes.
I found my happiness in very pretty stylish dresses, also at Zara, on Asos, H&M, and in some small independent designer boutiques, which I fell for here and there.
I also customized my favorite dresses from Sézane!
I invested in comfortable and 100% cotton lingerie, especially in wireless bras, because from the fourth month of pregnancy, I could no longer bear wearing underwired bras.
On the jewelry side, I discovered the bolas from Maison pleine lune, and I didn't take mine off, the Aimée Hexagone gold model, throughout my pregnancy… I really love the symbolism of this piece of jewelry, which soothes and calms baby thanks to its tinkling.
You will also find a little "Ohé locataire" brooch at Ohé Mimine, to celebrate your pregnancy and this little tenant growing inside you :).
ON THE BEAUTY AND COSMETICS SIDE
Since we welcomed Thelma, we prioritize all natural and healthy products (ideally organic) for our whole family. So very naturally, during this second pregnancy, I once again turned to products with a healthy and natural composition.
My favorites
Precious oil from eveetrose to prevent stretch marks and skin dryness, a 100% natural oil, with part of the profits donated to an association, which touches me deeply.
A non-greasy oil that I applied morning and evening from my 4th month of pregnancy.
And its subtle fragrance... it can also be used as a massage oil (massages that are clearly welcome during pregnancy :) )
Day cream Omum that you can find on the Eloisbio site (which offers organic and natural products for the whole family). A cream that hydrated and soothed my sensitive skin during the last months of pregnancy!
Alphanova 100% organic sunscreen Alphanova (SPF 50) that I used during our summer vacation at 6 months pregnant (I had never applied SPF 50 before this pregnancy, and I can tell you I came back with caramel skin as if I had applied 20/30, which is what I usually use... Moreover, this cream has a 100% healthy composition, so what more could you ask for!) on the Eloisbio website.
Massage oil Skinhaptics ideal for massages (thanks honeyyyy) that relieve lower back pain during pregnancy (oil we also use to massage Thelma who loves it!) - Available on the eshop Eloisbio.
IMMORTALIZE THIS PREGNANCY IN PHOTOS
With Edouard, we have always loved (and that’s an understatement haha!) Photography.
Just as when I was expecting Thelma, Edouard really enjoyed taking photos of my belly every month, with our little Thelma willingly playing along (Okay, not always, huh ;)...).
And it is also quite naturally that we wanted to do another lifestyle pregnancy shoot during our summer vacation near Marseille.
It is very important for us to keep these precious memories of my pregnancies through beautiful images, these life moments that imprint on us, and that we will enjoy looking at again and again, just the two of us and with our children, for the next 60 years!
We have always preferred outdoor and very natural shoots to studio shoots (much less aesthetic to our taste and not like us).
We had a beautiful photo session at the end of the day, where the light is the most beautiful, with Ketty Domingues (photographer) and her sister Maéva Domingues (videographer), who made a little video clip for us that was just as magnificent!
We were captivated by the light and warmth of their photos and shots, the naturalness that comes through, and the way they captured both our joy and our emotion!
Contact them with your eyes closed! They travel all over France!
Photo credits: Ketty Line
GENTLE MEDICINE
Acupuncture, prenatal yoga, haptonomy, osteopathy, shiatsu, and massages: these were at the heart of my 9 months of pregnancy in terms of gentle medicine.
We greatly favored gentle medicine and a very natural approach to my pregnancy and childbirth, as much as possible.
Also, to treat my pregnancy insomnia that started in my fourth month, I was lucky enough to try acupuncture, and I can tell you it was very effective from the first session! I also allowed myself two osteopathy sessions, which relieved me a lot, especially for my sciatica starting from the fifth month of pregnancy.
Finally, and even though the lockdown made things more difficult, I was able to attend some prenatal yoga classes, which help to refocus, learn to breathe well, and maintain some flexibility during pregnancy.
I am lucky to have a very considerate partner, who gave me a shiatsu session (adapted for pregnant women) in my sixth month of pregnancy.
It did me a world of good and helped to relax some tension points that were starting to be felt.
Be careful to choose a practitioner who is used to treating pregnant women!
Another approach to Alternative Medicine that I recommend is Reiki.
I discovered this practice during my pregnancy with Thelma. It is a meditative relaxation method through touch, providing comfort to the body and mind. I believe it is recommended to wait until the end of the third month of pregnancy to practice it.
Above all, find out to locate a practitioner near you (and someone trained, certified, very important!).
You can confidently contact Flavie Arnou (who practices in Nantes and Paris) and Louise Portafaix, who also works as a psychologist specialized in perinatal care (Louise is based in Lyon)
Finally, I was lucky to enjoy two relaxing massages adapted for future moms, and along the same lines, lots of relaxation, a moment for oneself, to let go...
These two places are true cocoons for future moms, where you can benefit from pregnancy-adapted care and workshops around parenting (prenatal and postnatal yoga, babywearing workshops, Pilates classes, breastfeeding workshops, ...).
Gynécée and the Prenatal Space are located in Paris, so sorry sorry to those from the provinces!)
Gynécée, the House of Women and Maternity, Paris 9th
Espace Natal, Maison Périnatale, Paris 16th
BIRTH PLAN:
The birth plan is a declaration of intent and a transcription of what we want or do not want for the day we welcome our baby.
It is important to share with the care team a bit of our experience and the basis of our wishes.
We were lucky to be supported by a golden gynecologist (whose name I won't give here for fear that all the future moms in the world would go see him and he would be too much in demand afterwards haha, but I promise, I will share his name if you ask me) who was attentive and interested in our birth plan project. He was the one who brought up the question of the birth plan, and we were reassured to see that our feelings and our needs, expectations, desires, were taken into account and welcomed with kindness.
Margaux, Doula at Deux Barres Roses had kindly sent me a birth plan template to fill out, which helped Edouard and me a lot in our journey.
Among other things, in our birth plan, we had mentioned these wishes (if it can give you some ideas for yours):
- to be able to choose the moment (and if I decide to have it, because there is no pressure at this level) when I want to have the epidural, and to do most of the labor without an epidural, in order to support my baby and the waves of contractions,
- enjoy the natural room during labor (bath, ball, soft music, ...),
- dimmed lighting in the delivery room,
- choose the position in which I will feel best to welcome our baby,
- the dad will welcome and catch our baby at the moment of arrival,
- the dad will cut the cord (delayed clamping requested so that our baby receives all the benefits of their cord (notably for the prevention of iron-deficiency anemia))
- skin-to-skin with baby for me and for the dad,
- welcome feeding during skin-to-skin
- to be kept informed step by step of everything that was going to happen and what they were going to do to me, administer to me (in fact, we had such a great team who knew us well, so all that was implied and spontaneous)
Of course, and unfortunately I am well placed to tell you this (I say "unfortunately" because our little Andréa arrived a month early, and her little lungs were not ready :/... so our little girl had to be quickly transferred to intensive care at Necker hospital, and I had to give up some wishes from our birth plan... the priority being to treat her and help her breathe, to simply live) there is your birth plan, and there is what you will experience, which is not predictable, not plannable in your birth plan.
What I mean is that it is essential to define with your partner what matters to you in welcoming your baby, but keep in mind that sometimes, things do not go as we dreamed or fantasized, and you have to know how to let go, especially regarding your birth plan.
I had to give up, with a heavy heart, the welcome feeding with Andréa, tears in my eyes from leaving her just after we had met, and I can tell you that it was a very difficult mourning to go through... even today, I struggle to talk about our meeting as the three of us without crying.
But more than anything, I know (and Edouard repeated it to me every minute) that the priority was for our little Andréa to receive vital care without delay. Her hospitalization felt like an eternity to us...
To end on a lighter note, I would tell you to ENJOY every moment of your pregnancy, to let yourself be carried and to savor this EXTRA-ordinary adventure: discovering your pregnancy, the announcement, your belly rounding, your exchanges with your baby, this exclusivity, their first little kicks, the ultrasounds and seeing this little baby growing, marveling at their little nose, their hand grabbing their leg, the waves on your belly, even the nausea is something I keep a "good" (yes, I'm a masochist haha) memory of because it is a sign that you are carrying Life, the contractions, these waves, this waiting... and THE meeting.
The one that will move you beyond all the words I could put here... ♡
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